Many people seem to think that confidence is something you are born with, a natural
trait that only a lucky few possess. The reality is confidence is a skill, not a gift. A skill
can be learned, practiced, and strengthened every day of your life.
Let’s think of confidence like a muscle. If you constellate your confidence muscle, it will
remain weak. If you work on it every day, through your actions, mindset, and small wins,
it will grow like a muscle.
Let’s reflect on Ali’s story. Ali used to always pass on speaking during meetings because
he didn’t want to say something “wrong.” One day he made a pledge to himself that he
would speak at least once in every group setting, no matter how small the comment.
The first few times were awkward. After about a month, he was now leading the
discussion. What changed? Ali built confidence through action!
Here are some effective ways to develop daily habits to create conference:
- Keep promises to yourself – Start out small and achieve small goals with this.
- Celebrate tiny wins – Every win, no matter how small, is evidence that you are
able. - Do not speak badly to yourself – Take a moment to recognize if you are replacing
rather than simply acknowledging your self talk. - Step into discomfort – Do one thing that lights up fear every day, even in the
tiniest way. - Employ body language – Stand tall, engaged in eye contact, smile. Your body
influences your state of mind.
The biggest confidence waster is waiting for permission, or for things to be perfect.
Confidence doesn’t come after success – it comes before success. You don’t have to be
street to take action. You become courageous by taking action despite fear.
If you’re having an experience around low self esteem wherever, I want you to hear me.
You are not broken. You are simply untrained. Just like learning a new language or sport,
self-confidence will be part of your identity, and it will happen through repetition and
effort.
Start today! Start speaking up, standing tall, showing up – even if your voice shakes.
Over time your brain starts to rewire itself to believe: I’ve done this before. I can do this
again.
So don’t wait for confidence, build it. One action, One day, One win at a time